"Realness" By The Thinker

"Realness"


By The Thinker


Real recognizes real
Or at least that’s what they say
But that cannot very well be the case
When I live in a world in which the fake is
What is recognized as real
And what is real is mocked and degraded
And seen as untruth
For how can someone truly accept what’s “real”
When that truth is so raw
And so painful
And it pierces the very heart and soul to the core
Yet, you claim you want to have someone that is “real”
Okay, love I will show you my “realness.”


Why do I live in a world in which inequality not only exists
But is accepted and is a much sought after reality
Let’s just be real, this was a system that was designed
By the few to benefit the few and those who recognize this truth are few
If I don’t have money it’s not because I didn’t strive for it or work hard
But it’s because the system was designed that way
At the same time, I myself, am an aberration
Because by all the stats and the facts
I should be nothing and doing nothing
Considering that no one contributed (let’s just keep it real)
To this destiny and to my reality
Yet, they try to climb aboard as I thrive in my reality
But you weren’t around when this shit was in your words, “mere fantasy”
Now, you are no longer needed; I’m building the legacy.


Real is real
Real cannot be false
Real cannot lie
And that’s why I can never tell a lie
I couldn’t lie to you about who you really were
I see within, outside, and all over you
And with the evidence that I have accumulated
All of your motives are to me revealed
It’s a blessing to have a gift of Divine Insight
And I use it daily to sift through and decipher
Ridiculous riddles that contradict clear thoughts
And from that inconsistency I must create translations
And therefore, draw an accurate portrait of every person
But it’s an abstract painting
Because people are much more complex than a still life
Or are they not?


My voice soars as I hold the purest note
It’s a truth that transcends
This earthly physical realm
It’s a truth that was gifted upon me
The Great Lord touched my tongue
With His anointing
And I tasted honey
But it burned within
And that’s how I live every single day
Sweet words coming from sweet lips
Some of the time
But that’s just to ready you for the truth
That is burning within
And that will inevitably arise
From my stomach
And that burn will no longer ache as a pain
Because I told the truth
And I couldn’t lie.


Lies upon lies others utter
To themselves and to everyone else
How can you be honest with me
When you lie to yourself?


It’s not possible!
And I see it!
I feel it all over you!
You are a liar!
You are not real
No one can be real if they lie
But I preach truth to you
Dig deeper
Work harder
Have the strength to CONFRONT yourself
Look at yourself in a literal and symbolic mirror
I do it regularly
That’s why I am who I am
I will put the work in to build a more perfect structure
I will devote the extra time to be a better building
And that’s why I am here where I am
And you are where you are
You don’t put in the effort that I do.


And since I am being real today
I must speak to you candidly
By speaking to you calmly and directly
And what I say is this
I don’t apologize to you
I won’t say that I’m sorry for being who I am
Just because you are jealous of my beauty
I won’t dim my personality
Because its brightness overwhelms you
I won’t diminish my personality
Just because bluntness scares you
I am a real woman
And I am not the woman that you want me to be
I am a nice person, but I am not sweet
I am a spiritual person who loves God and believes in Jesus Christ
Who is saved and who has a relationship with Christ
But I am not a Christian!
I am not a Muslim!
Because I don’t subscribe to your system of “religion”
My life is about relationships, not religion
And there ain’t shit you can tell me about being close to God
When I know more about Him than you ever could
Because He gave me spiritual gifts that you could only fathom
You judge me and won’t respect me
Because I deny your laws and regulations
And you think I’m going to Hell
Well, sweetie, angels are my companions
And I’ve seen Heaven and Hell
And with God on my side I’ve literally cast demons out
And I watched them go way
My name is already in the Book of Life
So there is nothing you can say to me about God and me.


But I digress, because I must, and I do mean must
Continue this conversation
Or rant, if you may
So what are some other bold statements that I must make?
I am not a whore
But I am not a prude who subscribes to your system of sexual repression
I am a woman who enjoys sex, who loves sex
And enjoys the sensuality and spirtuality of physical intimacy
And I’ll just leave it at that
I’m sorry, are you uncomfortable right now?


Well, continue to be, because I’m just getting started
I am a good person
Someone of character
Who always stands up for what is right
And will defend the downtrodden and defenseless
And I will do so loudly and boldly
See I tried to “soften” my voice
And make it like a pillow, "comfortable"
After all, I am very blessed with the gift of tact as well
“They” tried to “silence” my words
Because I wasn’t passive or pathetic enough
But I am not an insecure or lowly bitch
I am humble and modest
But I am not nor will I ever be passive again.


So who is this person?
Well, it’s not someone who fits your mold
That you designed for me
And that I tried for years to force and fit myself within
But it didn’t fit
You just can’t put a square piece in a round peg
And I’m that square piece
That won’t fit no matter how much she tries
But I laugh gleefully
As I triumphantly fly away
An eagle looking down upon
The banal chickens
Who are chittering and chattering
In a group
Too afraid to leave the henhouse
Sigh…
Pathetic.


And I walk slowly away
And I gaze down at the mic
Or rather the mic within
And I prepare to leave the stage
And I have uttered all that I was meant to utter
And there is nothing more to say
And there is nothing that is within anymore
Hurting me and my heart
And making me bleed all over
There is no piercing heartache
Caused by heartbreak
Because it’s all done
The work, that definitive work is completed
And this transformation is complete
But it’s a different sort of transformation
See, this isn’t some “illuminati” shit
Of “good girls” being made “bad”
That's not true transformation, but rather
That's denials and distractions
And an unwillingness to see and love self
But rather this is a deep and enduring
Maturation caused from systematic self-reflection
Self-awareness
And development of self-esteem
And now it is a true woman of God who stands before you
And you cannot even recognize her
Because it makes no sense to you
How, can this short little girl with the awkward personality and looks
All of a sudden look so beautiful and so strong
How can the shy girl who couldn’t look you in your eyes
Preach with wisdom that could come only from “Someone”
And how is it that her words cut like a knife?
And you want to object to it
And disagree with it
And demean it
But pointing out inconsistences like
How can you claim to be saved
And then “preach” about sexuality
And cuss boldly from the same piece
Well, I would say in response to that
I write this script of my life
And God is behind me supporting me
Within me empowering me
And above me, inspiring me
He knows me
He gets me
And He knows the whole person
And I would not be so rude to Him
As to lie to Him about who I am
I wouldn’t do that to Him
And although you are not worthy to see the real me
I allow you that privilege anyway
Why should I lie about anything?
Unlike you, I’m not ashamed of alleged “inconsistences”
It’s not inconsistent
It’s simply a part of the very complex and compact package that is me
Real recognizes real
“So can you see me?”


Drops mic and leaves